Old Dogs Are the Best Dogs.

Murphy, a great old dog. 

R.I.P.

Don't even think it.

 Government is boring when done right.

Competence is the best revenge.

On the other hand.

 Yeah, but what about whataboutism?

And a bad time was had by all.

In rabbit years.

 Some people don't look their age.

And some people don't act it.

Drink to me only with thine eyes.

 Taking the veil is the logical next step.

Get thee to a nunnery.

A meaty subject.

 He has a beef with that question.

Don't get your shorts in a knot.

The last resort.

 Atomic weapons only work with hurricanes.

Don't they know it's the end of the world?

Smalll sacrifices.

 Not that it was all that important.

Whatever happened to passing notes?

Wiggle room.

 Never say never again, not ever.

Saying and doing are two separate things.

Lightweight.

The railroad striped kind of bird.

She doesn't cotton to that pun.

Non-conformists unite !

 Going it alone is a violation of the user agreement.

Risking being deplatformed.

The year of living ironically.

 Woman Who Feeds the Homeless...

Fed by the Homeless.

Turps.

 A spoonful on lump sugar would be the dosage.

Not quite lethal.

Thin skinned.

 He's not a snowflake. He's a darling bud of may.

I know you are, but what am I?

The Great and Powerful Oz.

 Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

No need to be paranoid. Blue pill or Red?

In the immortal words of Dr. Johnson.

 "No, madam, you smell, I stink."

Apocryphal or not, it's correct.

The Lucretia Mystery.

 The original Lucretia was instrumental 

 In the overthrow of the Roman monarchy.

Speech, speach.

 And now Ebenezer Baptist Church has given Georgia a US senator.

Dreams do come true.

O' what a brave new world.

 Courage in a bottle is nothing new.

Just not only Dutch anymore.

Volunteerism lives.

 You can't get more selfless than that.

Running all those legal risks for others.

Up a tree.

 It kept his assets out of reach of the government.

As the twig is bent...

Comeuppance.

 There are all sorts of envy, some more petty than others.

And he has all of them.

Grand Theft.

 If you are going to steal, steal only the best.

As someone or other once said.

The one percent solution...

 The more things change, the more money the rich get.

Getting their unfair share.

The new normal.

 It's too early to tell, judging by the first week.

There's a long hangover to cure first.

Unreal.

 A mysterious force heretofore unknown.

A whole new physics.

All hang together.

 All for one and one for oneself.

One is the looking out for one.

Run, run, runaway bride.

 It's a veritable beau jest.

Oh, you swine.

Participation award.

Proof that nice guys don't always finish last.

The also-ran t-shirt.

Lost and found.

 Did you ask at the Lost and Found?

Look in the last place you had it.

It's all about you.

First thing is to know is thyself.

Second thing is to know the first.