Thursday, February 28, 2013

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

The ptooeytary gland.

Baseball players have over-developed ones.

They have atrophied in most men, as evidenced by the loss of spittoons.

Monday, February 25, 2013

Up the crick.

Ms. Foxx has a license to practice chiropractic.

Or a license to kill. One or the other.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

The sure thing.

The safe bet is seldom as safe as it seems.

Them there phones all look alike.

Saturday, February 23, 2013

It's all Greek to me.

Apparently, it's a 2,400 year-long story.

Wake me when she gets to Telly Savalas.

Friday, February 22, 2013

Good dog, bad dog.

All the signs were there.

Of course, reading comprehension is something else altogether.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Predictable parenting.

Henry shows a predictable but refreshing honesty.

Something every parent will understand.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Roe, roe, roe your boat.

Is Barney saying that boiled cockroach eyeballs are not a delicacy?

Everyone knows that lobsters are just insects.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Help is on the way.

Pillsbury Pharmaceuticals, the company with heart.

Which it keeps in a jar, attached to electrodes.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Play ball.

Duane obviously has the respect of his team.

But he's a good sport.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Friday, February 15, 2013

Golf.

It's polo without the horses.

Hey, Chess is a sport, too.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

She went to Jared.

Luckily, she didn't swallow it.

Consuela saves the day.
Except for the pearls dissolving in the wine.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Need to know.

Looks like Cynthia already knows everything she needs to know.

At least when it comes to managing men.

Monday, February 11, 2013

It will be on the test.

In the part about the bees, did he include colony collapse syndrome?

Isn't there an app for that?

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Space babies.

She could always learn by watching car commercials.

The wheels on the bus...go round and round.

Saturday, February 9, 2013

Friday, February 8, 2013

Tie one on.

Which is entirely different from She Wore A Yellow Ribbon.

Tony Orlando just seems like a nice guy.

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Twin Peaks, Explained.

Bob and the Log Lady, for instance.

And speaking in reverse is another one.

Monday, February 4, 2013

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Raymond Burr?

Luckily, Barney has a gun.

He's trying to say Burp Gun.
Or he wants Perry Mason to defend him?

Saturday, February 2, 2013

G.I. Bill.

Originally, "Drop and give me two."

But things got out of hand.
Somehow, Corporal Punishment was skipped for promotion.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Bizarro World.

Sounds more like the Antithesis Scalia to me.

Or Justice Fat Tony.