Friday, August 31, 2018

That's the fact, Jack.

Stick with the War on Christmas.
Get off your soapbox. Or high horse, as the case may be.



Thursday, August 30, 2018

'Tis the season.

There's also Summerfall Winterspring.
There's an overlap, whatever you choose.


Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

Monday, August 27, 2018

Dumbo sobers up.

A slogan that will go down in advertising history.
The greatest show on earth.



Sunday, August 26, 2018

Sauce for the gander.

You just have fight fire with pyromania.
Some people have no scruples.



Saturday, August 25, 2018

Combat tested.

Not endorsed by Hunter or Tanto.
Or by the Pentagon.

Friday, August 24, 2018

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

The impossible dream.

Speaking of things that can never happen...lower prices.
Test subjects. That's why they are called human shields.



Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Monday, August 20, 2018

Kissy face.

Stock options would be nice, too.
On the other hand, a kiss would lead to a lawsuit.

Sunday, August 19, 2018

First Person Chuter.

As they say in the business, "O' chute."
The original name was Active Chuter.



Saturday, August 18, 2018

You gotta have heart.

He's all heart. Or is it nerve?
The heart is a muscle, which he never exercises.

Friday, August 17, 2018

Mind-blowing.

He's going to flip his lid. Twenty-three skiddoo.
Whatever. This is not the emoji you are looking for.


Thursday, August 16, 2018

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

You're on candid camera.

He might be. You can never tell for sure.
Best to play it safe.



Tuesday, August 14, 2018

Monday, August 13, 2018

Peekaboo paradox.

Also works for kittens and babies.

Rattle your keys if all else fails.

Sunday, August 12, 2018

As real as it gets.

One of the most common names in the country.

Even more common than John Smith or Jane Doe.

Saturday, August 11, 2018

Friday, August 10, 2018

Thursday, August 9, 2018

If the ostrich jacket fits.

It's possible that the cheese induces nightmares.
Been exiled to a spare bedroom, apparently.



Wednesday, August 8, 2018

And that's not all.

People who make corrections are the worst.
There would still be an automated 800 number.



Tuesday, August 7, 2018

Make your mark.

Actually, it was an episode of The Tick cartoon show.
By Chairface Chippendale.


Monday, August 6, 2018

Sunday, August 5, 2018

Read the fine print.

That's where all the important stuff is concealed.
Good to see you, too.  She grows on you. Like a wart.



Saturday, August 4, 2018

The Eighth Dwarf.

Sleepy, Sneezy, Happy, Bashful, Doc, Grumpy...


And he became Dopey. And Sleazy.

Friday, August 3, 2018

Lawn darts.

Lots of lots, empty and otherwise.
A bit crowded around the edges.


Thursday, August 2, 2018

The old maid's tale.

It's not as if she meant that in any negative way.
She's no Martha.



Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Going to pot.

A house that large must be up to no good.
All the chandeliers are left one.