Monday, October 31, 2016

I scream.

Honesty is the best ploy.
Hoi polloi falls for the oy ploy.


Sunday, October 30, 2016

I think, therefore I am.

As Thomas Magnum used to say, "I know what you're thinking."
Men are tuned in.



Saturday, October 29, 2016

Not your father's Muppets.

They should never have broken up Kermit and Piggy.
At least she prepared for the lesson.



Friday, October 28, 2016

I got plenty of nothing.

Say no more, wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

Nothing is plenty for me.

Thursday, October 27, 2016

The reality shpw.

Plenty of excuses, but no reasons.

Totally unscripted.

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Booooring.

Something to look forward to.
Cheerful thought: It only gets worse.


Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Monday, October 24, 2016

Nice little place you have here.

It would be a shame if something happened to it.
The first mistake was opening the letter.



Sunday, October 23, 2016

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Friday, October 21, 2016

The Picture of Dorian Pillsbury.

He hasn't aged a day in the last six years.
He knows the price of everything.



Thursday, October 20, 2016

Public Enemy.

That's how James Cagney got his start, except it was a grapefruit.
And it was Mae Clark, not Life.



Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Swipe home.

Can't we just get virtual?
Sitting in the principal's office is even more boring.



Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Monday, October 17, 2016

A kind word.

Positive reinforcement is worth every penny.

You get what you pay for.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Saturday, October 15, 2016

If you have seen one.

No point in reinventing the wheel.
If people don't pay attention, it's their own fault.

Friday, October 14, 2016

That's a soft maybe.

Sir Humphrey Appleby couldn't have put it more vaguely.
If you squint at it in the right light, it might appear that way.



Thursday, October 13, 2016

The inedible bulk.

They should go to Comic Con.
Vulnerability is all the rage.



Wednesday, October 12, 2016

To bee or not to bee.

Put another kid on the barbecue.
Those are just grill marks.



Monday, October 10, 2016

Keep calm and carry on.

Now it all makes sense.
That's where all the money is going.



Sunday, October 9, 2016

Mr. Clean.

Who said that effectiveness is important?
The twenty-seconds spent washing could be better spent.



Saturday, October 8, 2016

Location, location, location.

You don't get a gold jacket for the soft sell.

Field of dreams.

Friday, October 7, 2016

Law of the jungle.

Unwritten law is difficult to enforce.
Stealing a golf umbrella is not a crime.



Thursday, October 6, 2016

What's up, Doc?

That's one way to look at it.
If they don't strangle him before then.



Wednesday, October 5, 2016

folie à deux.

Slightly around the bend.
You can never be absolutely sure.



Tuesday, October 4, 2016

If it ain't Baruch.

You never know who might be in the park.
Shared delusions are the best.



Monday, October 3, 2016

Post post modern.

If you have the flint knife, you can get the other things.

The future will be glowing.

Sunday, October 2, 2016

The price is wrong.

New game show, twice is right.
Wrong is right. Cheap at half the price.



Saturday, October 1, 2016

Reverse schadenfreude.

The simple pleasure of gloating is denied him.
Someone else succeeding can ruin the whole day.