The Incredible Shrinking News.

All the news that fits on a napkin.

And a paywall provides even less shelter.

Duke of earl.

A title is a title.

Some real titles have less behind them.

Second movement.

Diarrhea runs right off the tongue.

And dysentery sounds like nobody has a good word for Terry.

Put a tiger in your tank.

It's the thought that counts.

At least he didn't hand over his debit card.

Baked by eleves in a hollow tree.

Genetically modified elves.

Which explains how they get so much done.

LIttlest house on the prairie.

Privy Purse is where you keep the penny you have to spend.

Behind the privet hedge.

Valley Forged.

Let the accountants battle it out.

They're expert reproductions!