Tradition

 He was born into a long line of bad drivers.

Upholding the family honor.

Blast from the past.

 Sounds like one of Grandpa Eb's suggestions

The second verse has the monkey meat,

Everybody talks about the weather.

 Weather, you like it or not.

Willis Carrier's first attempt at air conditioning.

It only follows.

An all-inclusive hate, no extra charge.

He hates being trendy.

Meat the press.

 Nothing gets past Dabney, if it circles around.

Cut on the dotted lines.

COLA.

 The cost of living has to be offset somehow.

Someday he might ask him for a favor, as the Godfather might say.

The Tatler.

 Maybe it will be eaten by a Stool Pigeon.

It's name is Flip.

To Do List.

Next item on the agenda, create an agenda.

Twenty questions.

Park it.

 Bench mark, what you get from sitting on the bench.

On The Bench, apocalyptic novel by Neville Shute.

Chalk it up to experience.

 Someone finally caught up to the Gingerbread Man.

You are a real riot.

Mother of invention.

 Look who is talking.

And it will be reinvented after WWIII.

Going nuclear.

Last one out turn off the lights.

Get off the escalator.

Room to swing a cat.

 All cats have nine lives.

If you can see the cat, it isn't Shroedinger's.

It's the pits.

Or as he was told lately, he feels nauseous.

And a Gram Molecule is a speck of Grandma.

Lighter than air.

You would have to throw them to get the lift.

Or you could go into orbit for the same effect.

Progress is out most important product.

 The only tip he will give is, "Work harder."

Progress, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.

And Salieri wept.

 You will not hear that in Amadeus.

It could have been Wolfgang Puck.

Wild Eb.

 They called him Wild "Bill" Pillsbury.

Felix Leiter, operative in the James Bond series. (Played by Jack Lord and David Hedison.)

Loose lips sink ships.

 He is classified. Or possibly certifiable.

It was written with a poison pen.

To Be or Not To Be.

 Unlike A Midsummer Night's Dream which shows us a lot of Bottom.

Pish-tush, 'tis nothing.

Descent of Man.

 Also the birthday of naturalist and author Charles Darwin.

They have a common ancestor.

The man of two minds.

 It goes mostly without saying.

But now that you mention it, no.

Don't let the stars get in your eyes.

 In real life, people see little birdies circling their heads.

Or someone will yell, "Watch where you're going !"

When in Rome.

It's bad luck to rob a grave robber.

How much does an Etruscan earn ?

Anti-social.

 Yes, but does he Like him?

Following can be difficult to tell from stalking.

Satisfaction guaranteed.

 You cannot disillusion those with no illusions.

A  marriage made in reality.

Life's a beach.

 As Hamlet said of Polonius, you will smell him out.

No flies on him, but plenty around him.

The war between cats and dogs.

 Cat robots are purpose built.

Julie Newmar, Rowr.

Grill master.

 He loves to eat and run.

Without refrigeration they will cause him to get the runs.

By definition.

 That is a lot of junk in the trunk.

He really enjoys her company.

Pock-marked.

 It takes a sick mind...

Just plain herpes to you.