The hangover.

What if the whole year is one long hangover?

We're going to need a bigger broom.

New Year's Eve.

Clyde isn't clairvoyant. That prediction he got wrong.

And that's Flo from the old comic strip Eb and Flo.
Eb & Flo by Paul Sellers.

Watch this.

The latest in spring-wound time-telling technology.

Plus it starts fires.

In bad company.

Alone has been defined as in bad company.

Ambrose Bierce, The Devils Dictionary.

The Grift Who Stole Christmas.

The ghost of Christmas presents.

He's like a fruitcake, nutty and lasts forever.

Play retreat.

Run it up the flagpole and see who will salute.

Flag etiquette requires it.

How would you like a nice Hawaiian Punch?

For all our Canadian friends. More like a Joe Palooka,

Never laid a glove of him.

Ho Ho Ho.

Matching long johns. What could be more festive?

He just phoned it in.

Too late smart.

Waiting until the last minute won't help.

He knows if you've been bad or good. It's a perjury trap.

It happened one night.

Mr. Poopy Pants is not laughing. Howdy Doody time.

Does it matter now? It depends.

The skin game.

Clyde is like a burrowing insect. The sand flea.

And just as hard to get rid of.

All the best people.

They have the right stuff. They were expendable.

It worked well for Eddie Murphy.

Ongoing vocabulary jargonization and purpose obfuscation.

I believe it was Thoreau who said "reduce the complications through prudent pruning of excess verbiage, reduce the complications through prudent pruning of excess verbiage."

 Or possibly, "Simplify, simplify."

Yelp yourself.

He yelps those who yelp themselves.

A little rating between friends.

A cluck above the rest.

That will put Trent in the hen house when his boss sees it.

He will feel like a dumb cluck.

Heaping piles of news.

That might be considered an opinion.

True, but still an opinion.

Survivor's guilt.

He's won the tontine. Last man standing.

Everyone else was voted off the island.

Wilkie Collins' Revenge.

Count Fosco will never be the same after this.

Nor Marian.
Not that the movie with Eleanor Parker, Gig Young, Alexis Smith and Sydney Greenstreet was more faithful. Greenstreet was perfect as Fosco, but otherwise...

Wallis and Edward.

She's no Leona Helmsley, Queen of Mean, though.

Those were the days.

Oh, shoot.

Otherwise known as the Austin Magic Pistol.

Voted most dangerous toy, 1948.

Later than you think.

It's get well card, just in a different format.

Man-flu is never fatal.

A funny mole.

He would have a better chance getting Ava Gardner's number.

And she's no longer available.

Vaping the old-fashioned way.

Suddenly, she feels faint.

Lucky guess.

O' Lordy.

Barney is one of those who helps himself.

He helps himself to whatever is available.

Have you ever seen a Russian dressing?

He's a regular Raskolnikov. No pain, no gain.

Next, The Flying Karamazov Brothers.

Unclear on the concept.

Disorderly conduct or orderly misconduct.

You decide, or not.

Indulgences sold in the gift shop.

Doesn't have a prayer. Or a snowball's chance.

Next handbarrow leaving in fifteen minutes.

My little runaway.

Del Shannon not Kanye. Or possibly Thelma and Louise.

I wonder what went wrong. Rub, run, run.

The Wild One.

A-wilding we will go, A-wilding we will go.

She's a Terminator without a cause

Cast of characters.

He's a real character. Except he's a faction.

If he goes into witness protection.

I swear by Ascpeius.

First, do no harm. Second, do no good.

And don't forget to get paid.