All dogs go to heaven.

But no cats.

It is doggie heaven, after all.

But first a little ruru.

And then he met with the aristocrats.

He probably liked it, too.

Global worming.

A cure for bad puns is next in the pipeline.

Somebody had to come up with a catchy phrase.

Phys Ed.

But beer pong will prepare them for college.

It's an elective.

Better this way or this way?

Focus, focus, focus.

Contacts are a lot easier to draw.

Turn a blind eye.

Making a spectacle of herself.

A trifle short-sighted.

Doctor, Doctor, Mister M.D.

Details, details.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Metered.

Would that make him a metered male?

Luckily, nobody uses the metric system.

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow.

I love you tomorrow...

Mañana is good enough for me.

Archie Bunker sings "Those Were the Days."

Edith you dingbat.

We could use a man like Edward Jenner these days.

Or a boondoggle.

No wonder he had to retire.

Zip it.

Cursory inspection.

What you see is what you get.

What do you mean by "we?"

Liability, Inc.

Maybe he should call Legal, instead.

MLB never sues over PEDs.

Scandal.

Isn't that a TV show of some sort?

Or is that How to Get Away with Murder?

Twenty-Three Skidoo.

A couple of real flappers.

And a couple of birds.

Post-It.

Don't forget to remember.

Who are you to say? No, really, who are you?

Twenty questions.

Is it bigger than a bread box?

And then go on PBS during pledge drives.

Everybody talks about the waether.

But nobody does anything about the climate.

Well, technically, they have done something to the climate.

Goodwill hunting.

Time off for good behavior is a valid reason, too..

Or just a guilty conscience.

A walk on the wild side.

If your inhibitions are out running around...

They can't be at home stopping you.

With a song in my heart.

Or possibly a murmur.

Fish in a barrel.

Yesterday.

Just wait until tomorrow, says Annie.

I love ya', tomorrow.

Fifth Generation.

That should put her in her place.

Up, up, and away.


Wait, that's the Fifth Dimension.

Quality control.

The very highest quality prices.

As good as it gets.

The Court Jester.

Whatever rhymes with chalice.

With apologies to Danny Kaye.

Fount of Wisdom Part Two.

The dialogue for today's strip ought to have been:

Panel One: Barney, Duane, Architect. Barney is looking at design of new building.

Architect: And the plaza in front of the building provides a welcoming...
Barney: Where's the fountain?

Panel Two.

Architect: In the interests of water conservation...
Barney: There must be a fountain.

Panel Three.

Architect: We can put a nice garden of drought-resistant plants.
Duane: What do people do when there's a fountain?

Panel Four: Architect thinks.

Architect: Eat their lunch, cool their feet...
Duane: Throw money.
Barney: There must be a fountain.


Heads will roll.

Fount of wisdom.

Barney's own make-a-wish fountain.

He's a mind reader.

Sleeps with the fishes.

And then it's a burial at sea.

There might be some pronoun mischief.

I Spy.

With my little eye, something that begins with C.

Robert Culp never complained.

Eraserhead.

It would only count if she first showed her work.

She deserves an incomplete.

Making a monkey out of Anrew Jackson.

It's like that book by James Burke, Connections.

One thing leads to another.

Critical mass and a chain reaction.

Re-education camp.

It's the short attention span that forces it.

Indoctrination requires repetition.