And why is a boxing ring square?

Very clever, Duane. Clever Duane is an oxymoron,

Why is a circulating library always found in the same place?

Who's Mckayla Maoroney?

Oh. We are not impressed.

The Olympic Games were such a long time ago.

Tenhut!

You can't lose what you never had.

Whatever.

It's Frank Zappa time.

Evidently, it's a message from Frank Zappa.

Which would be a big surprise, considering.

The Cast

For the benefit of those who cannot keep them straight without a playbill, the Cast of Characters of Barney & Clyde as seen so far. (UPDATE -- July 23. 2011. Dr. Marcie is christened, although we don't know if she is, in fact, churched up.)

The are listed in fuzzy order of importance, speaking characters first.

Barney -- J. Barnard Pillsbury, aka The Billionaire.
















Clyde -- Clyde Finster, aka The Bum.













Lucretia -- Lucretia Pillsbury, aka The Trophy Wife.














Cynthia -- Cynthia Pillsbury, aka Daddy's Little Girl.













Dabney -- Dabney Mountbatten III, aka Shifty.















Duane -- Duane Butkus, aka The Consummate Yes-Man.














Ms. Foxx -- As of January 22, 2011, Taffy Meredith Heidi-Anne Foxx. (At one time, Kimberli Tiffany-Anne. And her brother Dustin Fotheringill had the middle name Nigel.) Barney's Work Wife.











Katy, Cynthia's best friend, like forever.











Consuela -- The Pillsburys' Maid.










Charles -- aka Bonesteel, aka Elmer Nipplebaum, Barney's chauffeur.












Adolf -- aka Fluffykins McNeedsahug, Clyde's "business associate." (He speaks with his eyes.)











Rhonda -- TWBOW, The Woman Before the Other Woman, Barney's first wife, Cynthia's mom, part-time fantasy professional cat burglar, full-time Phoenix orthodontist.





Jeremy -- operator of The Pauper's Palace soup kitchen.















The Shrink, (UPDATE. Now that the most momentous week in the history of comics has ended, we can finally reveal that this is, indeed, Dr. Marcie, who passed a second-rate childhood in the panels of the beloved Peanuts.)















The Principal










The Beeb, the BBC, the Billionaire Boys Clubber, The Insufferable One -- Barney's pal, who looks suspiciously like Sid Fernwilter.

The ice cream vendors.

Rent-a-Cop, Museum security guard.












The Boys in R&D -- seen once, but mentioned other times. Heroes of the September 12, 2010 Sunday edition.





Tobias and Elspeth -- the Haunts who inhabit the antique furniture in Barney's palatial home. We like to think of them as the ancestors of George and Marian Kirby.



Mr. Frothstein, the consultant, who looks something like the Great Gildersleeve. If he had a monocle, he could be the twin of Reginald the jewelry store owner on Word Girl. And, yes, he's mostly just air.

From Barney & Clyde Appreciation Blog

Zee Waiter. Saved by the gallant Barney from the embarrassment of allowing a lady to pay for a meal.


John, the Plumber. Plumbing the depths of comics humor. The man with the golden derriere.




















Other Characters.

Ms. Schwab -- Cynthia's long-suffering art teacher, mentioned off-panel.
Stanley Wienerwald -- Long-suffering victim of Cynthia's bullying, mentioned off-panel.


And last, but uncertainly not least, The Parrots, who seem to know much more than they are saying.


At long last:

From Barney & Clyde Appreciation Blog

Ebenezer Pillsbury, Barney's father, and Cynthia's doting grandfather.





The Waitress at The Pauper's Palace Soup Kithcen.

The Cast

For the benefit of those who cannot keep them straight without a playbill, the Cast of Characters of Barney & Clyde as seen so far. (UPDATE -- July 23. 2011. Dr. Marcie is christened, although we don't know if she is, in fact, churched up.)

The are listed in fuzzy order of importance, speaking characters first.

Barney -- J. Barnard Pillsbury, aka The Billionaire.
















Clyde -- Clyde Finster, aka The Bum.













Lucretia -- Lucretia Pillsbury, aka The Trophy Wife.














Cynthia -- Cynthia Pillsbury, aka Daddy's Little Girl.













Dabney -- Dabney Mountbatten III, aka Shifty.















Duane -- Duane Butkus, aka The Consummate Yes-Man.














Ms. Foxx -- As of January 22, 2011, Taffy Meredith Heidi-Anne Foxx. (At one time, Kimberli Tiffany-Anne. And her brother Dustin Fotheringill had the middle name Nigel.) Barney's Work Wife.











Katy, Cynthia's best friend, like forever.











Consuela -- The Pillsburys' Maid.










Charles -- aka Bonesteel, aka Elmer Nipplebaum, Barney's chauffeur.












Adolf -- aka Fluffykins McNeedsahug, Clyde's "business associate." (He speaks with his eyes.)











Rhonda -- TWBOW, The Woman Before the Other Woman, Barney's first wife, Cynthia's mom, part-time fantasy professional cat burglar, full-time Phoenix orthodontist.





Jeremy -- operator of The Pauper's Palace soup kitchen.















The Shrink, (UPDATE. Now that the most momentous week in the history of comics has ended, we can finally reveal that this is, indeed, Dr. Marcie, who passed a second-rate childhood in the panels of the beloved Peanuts.)















The Principal










The Beeb, the BBC, the Billionaire Boys Clubber, The Insufferable One -- Barney's pal, who looks suspiciously like Sid Fernwilter.

The ice cream vendors.

Rent-a-Cop, Museum security guard.












The Boys in R&D -- seen once, but mentioned other times. Heroes of the September 12, 2010 Sunday edition.





Tobias and Elspeth -- the Haunts who inhabit the antique furniture in Barney's palatial home. We like to think of them as the ancestors of George and Marian Kirby.



Mr. Frothstein, the consultant, who looks something like the Great Gildersleeve. If he had a monocle, he could be the twin of Reginald the jewelry store owner on Word Girl. And, yes, he's mostly just air.

From Barney & Clyde Appreciation Blog

Zee Waiter. Saved by the gallant Barney from the embarrassment of allowing a lady to pay for a meal.


John, the Plumber. Plumbing the depths of comics humor. The man with the golden derriere.




















Other Characters.

Ms. Schwab -- Cynthia's long-suffering art teacher, mentioned off-panel.
Stanley Wienerwald -- Long-suffering victim of Cynthia's bullying, mentioned off-panel.


And last, but uncertainly not least, The Parrots, who seem to know much more than they are saying.


At long last:

From Barney & Clyde Appreciation Blog

Ebenezer Pillsbury, Barney's father, and Cynthia's doting grandfather.





The Waitress at The Pauper's Palace Soup Kithcen.