Saturday, August 31, 2013


Testing is the biggest racket.

Interpreting tests is the second biggest.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Thursday, August 29, 2013

School daze.

Mind-numbing twelve months of the year.

Three extra months in which to be a pain in the principal's neck.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Outlook hazy.

Maybe someone at the National Weather Service knows.

Barney hasn't the foggiest.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Monday, August 26, 2013

Vulture capitalist.

They circle the block in their black limos.

At least they aren't talking behind his back.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

It's Mighty Thor.

Marvel might want to sue.

Mr. Fantastic is Duane's other name.

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Friday, August 23, 2013

Thursday, August 22, 2013


Someone has had too much to drink...

Or not enough.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

How Low Can You Go?

With your host, Hal Lowe.

I'll take Fred Thompson for $1,000, Hal.

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Freshness guaranteed.

Not healthy to keep that bottled up.

Best when fresh.

Monday, August 19, 2013

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Saturday, August 17, 2013

All Cretans are Epimenides.

It's only a paradox if one assumes that he is telling the truth.

If he is lying, then everything is copasetic.

Friday, August 16, 2013

She can see right through you.

Not a ghost of chance of fooling Elspeth.

When a ghost vase appears, it will serve him right.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Takes a lickin'.

And keeps on making obscure jokes.

And there should an accent over the first "e" in Vallèe.

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Monday, August 12, 2013

You don't know, Jack.

That's too small to be a jack plane.

That's more of a smoothing plane.

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Hurling is followed by curling.

As in curling up in a fetal position.

And then there is hocking up.

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Have I got a bargain for you!

They'll settle on 60/40.

And that can be claimed as a business expense.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Timing is everything.

Barney has done a couple of spit-takes.

When you know it's coming, it becomes a matter of form.

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Undead and loving it.

But in a few years, the teenaged Cynthia will have changed her mind.

Of course, both could describe the average teenager.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Barefoot in the Park.

Robert Redford and Jane Fonda never considered that.

Neil Simon either, for that matter.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Call the midwife.

Say it isn't so.

She did play a spy on MI-5 a while back, if that's any comfort.

Monday, August 5, 2013

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Hep, I've fallen.

It's always the last place you would look.

Here I come to save the day!
One letter short of an emergency.

Saturday, August 3, 2013


Or the video chat.

You can see too much, Eb.

Friday, August 2, 2013

In glorious living color.

Any resemblance to real life is purely accidental.

What's on the other channels?